Tuesday, April 12, 2005


Very Merry Kerry

I knew I had seen this Christmas special, way back when Bush was missing a physical exam, Bill O'Reilly was punting a football, and other lesser events were all coalescing to form the basis of the Democratic Party's 2004 Presidential campaign, thirty-odd years in advance. Stephen Covey would call this proactive, I suppose.

People told me I was crazy, that such a show had never aired. Like the Science Fiction Film Awards broadcast where William Shatner sang his very own jaw-dropping rendition of Rocket Man. It never happened, they insisted. It was just in your dreams.

Well, let them explain this! According to unnamed sources, included in Kerry's military records, which he promised Tim Russert he would release, is this ad torn from the pages of an old TV Guide:

What's that you say? Fraudulent?! Well, how will we ever know, unless Kerry follows through and signs the Form 180?

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